Week 13 – 5 Steps to Move Past Grief and Pain

Posted on June 10, 2011 by pastorpstephens

Good morning, it has been 13 weeks since I have had my back surgery and I am feeling very good.  I still wake up with some stiffness in the morning but it is nothing compared to the pain I had before the surgery.  I am not on any pain meds, not even regular Tylenol.  I am feeling so good that I don’t even feel like talking about my back today but would rather spend time talking about talking about a subject that has been on my heart here of late.  A person who has been through some tough times in the 18 months recently asked me “How do I get past my grief?”  That is a very important question for us to be able to answer.  God does not desire us to live under a cloud of grief or depression or for that matter to live in any other unhealthy emotional state.  Answering those questions, “How do I move on from my grief, how do I get past my hurt and frustration?” is so important that God has provided examples in His word of people who have dealt with those very issues.   The top two examples that come to my mind of people in God’s word who have dealt with those questions are men named Elijah and Samuel.  Which brings me to my first point:

  1.  Grief can affect everyone, even people of faith! 

Elijah was a prophet, a man of great faith and yet he struggled in his life with a season of overwhelming grief.  That tells me that we should not allow anyone to question our faith or salvation simply because we are currently struggling with some emotional pain.  There are lessons that can be found in God’s word for us as to how we should deal with our emotional pain during those seasons of pain.  In this post, I want to deal with lessons found in Elijah’s life.

In 1 Kings 19 the prophet Elijah is on the run from Queen Jezebel.  Despite being used by God to work miracles in front of the Nation of Israel to show the people that Baal was a false God, the people did not repent on a large scale from idol worship and now Queen Jezebel has threatened to have Elijah killed.  Elijah runs into the wilderness and isolates himself from everyone.  He is on the run, he feels like his work has been in vain, he feels unappreciated, he feels like he is all alone, he feels like he has been abandoned and Elijah wishes…no, he prays that he would die.  He is full of grief and he is depressed.

Elijah says, “It is enough!  Take my life Lord!” And he is saying, “I cannot do this anymore, I can’t go one!  Lord I am ready to end it all.”  Here is a man who could pray and stop the rain or pray and bring the rain.  Here is a man who could pray and call forth fire, a man whose prayers God answered and yet God did not answer this prayer!  God wanted Elijah to live, even though Elijah felt useless and alone and even though Elijah wanted to die.  I know that sometimes people get to that point where they think they cannot go on and where they wish they were dead.  We need to remember that God is sovereign and even our lives are not in our hands.  David wrote in Psalm 139:16 “Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.”

You may not think you can go on, but you can!  And you must because God has days that have been written for you – days of peace, days of joy, days of gladness, days ordained from the foundation of time!  The second step to moving past grief is to take care of your physical needs.

2.   Take Care of your physical needs. 

Elijah went to sleep under a juniper tree.  And the bible says in 1 Kings 19:5 – 7  the Lord sent an angel to minister to him who, “Arise and eat. Then he looked and behold, there was at his head a bread cake baked on hot stones, and a jar of water. So he ate and drank and lay down again.  The angel of the LORD came again a second time and touched him and said, “Arise, eat, because the journey is too great for you.” 

In this passage we see that the Lord will indeed minister to us during our seasons of grief.  And in this passage we see the steps we should take to move beyond our grief.  Some of those steps include taking care of our physical needs.  The Lord provided food and water for Elijah and allowed Elijah to rest.  Elijah had run out to the wilderness, to a desert-like area and was in a place where he did not have access to the nourishment his body need – apart from what the Lord was now providing him.  It seems like Elijah was so busy running away from his problems that he neglected his own physical needs.  So many times when we get to a bad place emotionally we neglect our health or we cope with the situation in unhealthy ways. We either don’t eat enough or we eat too much.  We may cope in other ways which are unhealthy for our bodies.  We may partake in great deals of alcohol or other substances in an effort to numb the pain that we are feeling.  The Lord would have us to remember that our bodies are His temple.  We need to cope in healthy ways and we need to nourish ourselves appropriately and get adequate rest.

I would also like to add that sometimes taking care of your physical needs includes going to the doctor.  If you have been in a state of grief for a lengthy period of time, there can be real physical effects on your body.  You may be low on certain nutrients, vitamins, etc that could lead to malnutrition, poor health and even depression.  See your doctor and have a proper assessment made of your physical needs.  There is nothing wrong with a Christian going to the doctor and taking appropriately prescribed medications.  “The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof.”  God has ordained the use of doctors and medications.  The Lord had some work for Elijah to do and it would require that Elijah be rested and prepared for that work, the Lord took ministered to Elijah’s physical needs.  Which brings me to the third lesson I see in this scripture, “Examine your feelings.”

  1.  Examine your feelings.

The bible says that Elijah arose and went in the strength of that food to Mount Horeb, the mountain of God.  It was a trip that took 40 days and it was a trip that was 200 miles!  When Elijah arrived at Mount Horeb, the bible says in 1 Kings 19:9 that the Lord asked him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”  Elijah responded to the Lord, telling the Lord why he was upset and why he felt scared, alone and abandoned.  As I read that passage, it made me wonder why would the Lord ask someone who was tired and emotionally drained go on a 40 day trip of 200 miles?  I believe that there are two main reasons; first I believe it is because the Lord wanted Elijah to know that just as He sustained Elijah during that trip, He would sustain Elijah through this season of depression and protect Elijah from the threats of Jezebel which worried him so much.  What is the second reason for the 40 day trip?  I believe that trip gave Elijah time to reflect.  Elijah had 40 days to contemplate and pray about the things that were troubling him, 40 days of solitude, no IPOD, no TV, no friends or family who would need attention and yet he still struggled and had questions for God.  I believe that passage was put it in there for us.  You see, I think that the Lord wants us to know that He doesn’t just expect us to snap out of our grief or to just flip a switch and be over whatever emotional issue is bothering us.

You too may go on a long journey of prayer and contemplation and still not understand the big picture.  During your journey the Lord may ask you more than once, “Why are you here?”  The Lord asked Elijah and the Lord let Elijah vent.  Elijah responded, “I’m all alone, everyone else has abandoned You but me!”   It’s as if Elijah was saying, “I’m all alone, the whole world has abandoned me and nobody understands how I feel!”  Some people don’t think that they can vent to the Lord.  But we can.  The Lord understands us.  I love what the bible says in Psalm 103:14 “The Lord is mindful of our frame, He knows that we are but dust.”  You can tell your problems to the Lord, without retribution, even when you are wrong.  The Lord pointed out to Elijah that Elijah was wrong, there were others who trusted the Lord and who were faithful.  If you feel alone and abandoned, you need to know that you are not alone, there are people out there who are faithful to God, who will minister to you in His name.  After Elijah finished venting, the Lord tended to his spiritual needs.

  1.  Tend to your spiritual needs.

The bible says in 1 Kings 19:11 that the Lord called Elijah to the front of the mountain and passed by in front of him.  And when the Lord passed there was a strong wind, an earthquake and even a fire, but the Lord was not in those things.  But afterward a still, quiet voice spoke to Elijah again, “What are you doing here?”

The Lord tended to Elijah’s spiritual needs.  Elijah did not need to be reminded of the Lord’s power as demonstrated by the strong wind, the fire or the earthquake. Elijah needed to hear the still, quiet voice of the Lord.  Elijah needed to be reminded of the presence of the Lord in his life.  I think that is why the Lord sent him to Mount Horeb.  Mount Horeb is also known as Mount Sinai, the place of where God had given Moses the Ten Commandments.  This was a place where the Lord knew Elijah would make a connection with the Lord; it was a place where the Lord knew Elijah would be able to hear Him without the noise of the world, without distractions and interruptions.

I think that sometimes we go through seasons where we struggle and where we need to be reminded not of the Lord’s great power but rather of His special presence in our lives.  Sometimes we can be more receptive and able to hear better spiritually when we take ourselves to a place where we know the Lord has shown up before.  The really sad part is that sometimes when we are doubting God’s presence in our lives, sometimes when we are going through those seasons when we wonder where He is, those are the seasons when we  STOP seeking him.  Those are the seasons when we STOP listening for that still quiet voice.  And that is tragic because those are the times when we need to see Him and hear Him the most.

If you are struggling with grief, don’t stop going to your place of worship.  Don’t stop reading your bible.  Don’t stop fellowshipping with your Christian friends.  Those are the places where you are most likely to be reminded of the Lord’s presence in your life.  Take yourself to a place where you are most likely to hear the still, quiet voice of our Lord.  Make a time, make a place where there are no outside noises, where there are no interruptions, where there are no distractions.  Tend to your spiritual needs!  Lastly, when you are grieving, remember to be who God called you to be.

5.   Be who God called you to be.

The Lord spoke to Elijah and instructed him in verse 1 Kings 19:15 – 16 to go anoint Hazael king over Aram; and Jehu king over Israel; and Elisha as a prophet.  The Lord still had work for Elijah to do.  The Lord wanted Elijah to move forward and get involved and engaged once again in Kingdom work  The Lord still had plans for Elijah.  You need to know that the Lord still has plans for you too!  Ask the Lord to strengthen you.  Ask the Lord to help you move forward!  Ask the Lord to help you be who He called you to be.  Take baby steps if you have to, but take some steps just the same!

It is never God’s desire for us to be stuck in our grief, wasting away in a place of wilderness.  It is His desire that we know His embrace, feel His love and walk in the power and comfort that only He can bring.  It is His desire that we move forward and be who He called us to be.  Here is the list again.  Remember, anything that God wants us to do, He helps us to do.

  1. Grief can affect everyone, even people of faith!
  2. Take Care of your physical needs.
  3. Examine your feelings.
  4. Tend to your spiritual needs.
  5. Be who God called you to be.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, can't go on, faith, God | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Week 12 – Tempted to do too much

Posted on June 2, 2011 by pastorpstephens

Last week was a good week and I had a great weekend.  I was able to spend some time with all of my family and to have a good time at church as well.  My back has been feeling good.  I think that I pushed my boundaries a little bit though this past weekend and did something I should not have done.  I did not lift anything heavy, I did not run or make any sudden movements but I did do something that reminded me I am still recovering from back surgery.  I got down on the floor and laid on my stomach to color in a coloring book with my granddaughter.  As I laid there it became evident very quickly that I was not quite ready for this position.  My lower back was not ready to bend at the angle that this position required.  I had to roll to my side and get back up to a chair.  Apparently it will be a few more months before my body is ready to get on the floor and play with my granddaughter.  I will probably have to go through some physical therapy before I am able to play on the rug with her and I know that it will be at least 3 to 4 more months before I am able to pick her up and hold her again.  I have been tempted to pick her up several times in the last 3 months but I know that this is against the rules.  I still have the restriction not to lift anything that weighs over ten pounds as it may jeopardize my recovery.  While my granddaughter is small, she is definitely over 10 pounds!  And I really would love to pick her up!  It is so hard not to pick her up when she reaches out those little arms!

Sometimes there are things that that we are tempted to do but that we know are not good for us.  Those are the times that we must be strong!  During those times I think of what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 10:13

No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.    1 Cor. 10:13

For me the way to endure it is to know that if I follow the rules now, I will be able to do so much more in the years to come with my granddaughter and with her little sister who is scheduled to arrive sometime in late October.  So, in the meantime, we will color at the kitchen table and I will be content to let others place my little munchkin next to me on the couch when we watch TV.  I can overcome the temptation to do those things that are not good for me because the Lord has better things in store for me down the road.

I don’t know what temptation you may be fighting, but I know that the consequences usually outweigh the momentary pleasures found in giving in to that temptation.  Stand firm, ask the Lord for the strength to do the things you are supposed to do and to avoid the things you are not to do.  I know that the Lord will provide a way out.  He will help you fight that temptation; He has your back.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, God, prayer, witnessing | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Week 11 – It’s Important to tell your story!

Posted on May 23, 2011 by pastorpstephens

I was at the mall this weekend and I was walking past one of the small kiosks inside the mall where various trinkets are sold and though I avoided eye contact as I walked by, the vendor made his pitch.  Though the pitch was smooth, I was out profiling with my wife, daughter and granddaughter and they were in serious shopping mode.  In just the few seconds that I stopped to share a polite “No thanks” they pulled ahead by 14 stroller lengths.  After hearing my polite rejection, this young man asked if I minded if he asked a question about my brace.  I told him that it was okay, ask anything you want.  He wanted to know if I had some type of back surgery and I briefly explained the procedure.  He then wanted to know if it had been a good experience as he has been having problems with his L2, L3 and L4 vertebrae.  I let him know that the surgery to fuse my L4 and L5 vertebrae 11 weeks ago had been a very good experience for me.  I was in a bit of a hurry at that point as the family was nowhere in sight and I had visions of a “Red Apple Sale” going on without my supervision – like that ever made a difference.  Basically, I just wanted to catch up and spend some time with my family, none of whom were in my line of sight at this point.  So I directed him to this website to check out my story and the good progress that I have been blessed with.  He plugged the link into his smart phone and said, “Thanks!”  I then hustled on my way looking for the coolest grandkid in sunglasses in the mall.

After I left, I felt a little guilty because I wish I had taken a little more time to give him more details about just how well things are going for me.  I wish I had taken the time to tell him how my lower back did not hurt the last time a storm rolled in to town and the temperature dropped 20 degrees.  I wish I had taken the time to tell him that I had been in the mall with my family for over an hour and I had not yet had to place my hands on my knees and bend over like a beat up football player in the huddle struggling to stay on the field while the team completed a 4th quarter comeback drive.  I wish I had taken the time to tell him how I now was looking forward to sitting in the bleachers some day watching my granddaughters play tee ball, soccer or attend dance recitals or whatever it is that they will do – I  will do that now without pain that I would have had to deal with before I had the surgery.   You see, I feel like I missed out on an opportunity to fully share my story and tell how God has blessed my through this surgery and through my recovery.  As Christians I believe we are called to share our story.  Paul said in Colossians 4:5-6

Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunity.  Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person.

Hopefully next time I will be a little better prepared to share my story and let someone know how good God has been to me.  Hopefully, I won’t be in such a hurry to rush off.   I know my family won’t run off without me, but I may never see this young man again.  I made a promise to myself that I would post my encounter on my website and hope that nice young man reads it.  I also made a promise to myself that I will look for him the next time I go to the mall and see how he is feeling and let him know that I have been praying for him, for pain relief and for any decisions he may need to make.

If you are a Christian, be ready to share your story.  Be ready to tell somebody how good God has been to you.  You don’t have to know a whole lot of theological terms.  You just need to know what the Lord has done for you.  In John chapter 9, we learn about a man who was blind from birth.  The religious leaders are trying to discredit this miraculous work of Jesus Christ and discredit His ministry and His claim to be the Son of God.  They bring in this man who was formerly blind and they say, “Tell us who He is”.  The man basically says, “I don’t really know who He is.  But I tell you this, I once was blind and now I see!”

That’s his story!  I once was blind and now I see!  That is a powerful story.  Your story can be powerful too.  Your story of how the Lord has forgiven you, strengthened you and provided for you is unique and powerful!  People can argue with a lot of things, but they cannot argue with your personal experience!  Your story of how God is working in you, working for you and working through you can make a powerful difference in someone’s life.  Make the most of your opportunities to tell you story!

If you would like to read about my story, and how the Lord worked in my life, click on the tab “Why I Believe.”  May God bless you and give you a good night’s sleep and help you with whatever decisions you may need to make.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, God, Uncategorized, witnessing | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Week 10 – My Recovery from Back Surgery is going well!

Posted on May 16, 2011 by pastorpstephens

My recovery from my spinal fusion is going well.  I have not had to take any medications for several weeks.  The only discomfort I have had is some stiffness in the middle back and rib area that I experience in the early morning hours about 3:30 or 4:00 am.   I have not had any nerve pain other than one or two sharp “pin-stick” sensations in the last two weeks.  My sciatic nerve has not been bothering me at all – and last week I put it to a real test.  I attended a 3 day insurance seminar at the end of the week.  I arrived each day at 6:00 am even though the class did not start until 8:00 am.  Insurance nerd or glutton for punishment?  No!  I arrived early so that I could do some of the work that I was missing out on by being out of the office.  I stayed in the hotel conference room each day until about 5:15 pm – almost 11 hours in chairs you would not find at a “Relax the Back” store!  In prior years this 3 day experience would have had me walking like Grandpa McCoy.  For you younger folks, who don’t know who that is, let’s just say I would have been walking so bent over that you would have thought I dropped a contact lens.  This year was totally different.  My lower back did not bother me at all!  No aches, no pains, nobody saying, “Did you drop something sir?”

The surgery has been a very good decision for me.  I met a man at the conference who had the same surgery this year in January and he said he is also having excellent results.  His experience has been different; he said he was out of his brace after only a couple of months.  I wonder if his doctor only made him wear it for a few weeks or if he decided that he did not need it after a few weeks.  I have been told that I need to wear mine for 6 months.  I go back to the doctor next month – June 22nd – and I will find out more details then, when can I walk for exercise, when will I get out of the brace, when my Physical Therapy will begin.  I have heard from other people that their experience has also been different in regard to doing more walking and Physical Therapy on an earlier basis.  I think it is because my doctor is taking a more conservative approach to my recovery.  I am okay with that because I have heard that he is one of the best and that his patients have better long term results.  Though I admit I am looking forward to starting some of my old activities like running, lifting weights and playing basketball and taking off my brace, I must also admit that I am not in a hurry to do something stupid.  The bible says in Ecclesiastes 9:11 “the race is not always to the swift”.  Sometimes we need to be patient.  Sometimes we need to relax.  Easy to say, but hard to do.  I know, because I am not a very patient person.  But one thing I have learned is that the race to recovery is not a sprint, it is more like a marathon.  Paul said in 1 Corinthians 9:24

“Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win.”

I want to run in such a way that I win.  I want to pace myself and run the race so that I may win.  What is winning?  Having a good result.  Following my doctor’s orders.  Being able to do the things I enjoy without pain; walking, running, playing sports, going to the grocery with my wife – being able able to pick up grandbabies again!  Winning means being able to look back when it is over and know that I was patient and did my best.  Knowing that I did not do anything to get in the way of the work of the doctor or the will of the Lord.  So far, things are going well.  But I still need to exercise patience.  I pray that the Lord will continue to help me in that area. And I know He will because He is a good and gracious God…He has my back.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, God, witnessing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Week 9 – How long will I have to wear my brace?

Posted on May 11, 2011 by pastorpstephens

I have been wearing my back brace now for 2 months and have at least 4 more months to go.  It is like a big girdle that extends from about 4 inches below the belt line in the back to just below the sternum in front.  The material contains a hard plastic piece in front and a larger piece in back which extends up and around over my ribs.  My wife calls is my turtle shell.  I gird it up fairly tight to get sufficient support while my lower back is still recovering from the surgery.  Usually I wear a T-shirt under the brace and then some large shirt (like a Hawaiian shirt) over the brace when I go to work.  I have some nice ones that are solid colors that I wear on Sundays.  Some people have not known that I have the brace on until they have just seen me in a T-shirt with the brace.  One fellow saw the brace and said, “Oh, you are wearing a brace today.”  I told him I wore it every day and he said, “Oh, I just thought you had been gaining some weight since the surgery.”  I guess it is not always apparent to others what we have supporting us or “girding us” for the situations we face in life.  King David speaks about the Lord in Psalm 18:39 saying “Thou hast girded me with strength for battle”.

 I know that sometimes people don’t see the Lord girding us or supporting us.  Sometimes they don’t see it because we are quiet about our faith and it goes unnoticed. Other times they don’t see it because we forgot to wrap up tightly in Him on that day.  Some stress or struggle hits us and we react out of emotion or we react out of our flesh.  We can get upset and lose control and sometimes do and say some things that would make others think we don’t have any control at all.  I think if we are all honest we can all relate to that and would have to admit that we have all been there at one time or another.

We need to remember that the Lord has girded us for strength.  He has fitted us for patience and self-control.  He wants to support us and take care of us in and through every situation.  We need to do what Paul says in Colossians 3:12 “as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”  And I believe we need to wrap it on tight!  Cause some days that brace wants to slip off!

Well, I hope that you have a good week.  I hope that you are not faced with any stress and struggles. But if you are, I hope that you have been braced and supported by the Lord.  Until next time, stay strong and Keep the faith.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, God, witnessing | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Week 8 – Never too Busy for Prayer

Posted on May 5, 2011 by pastorpstephens

Today was a very busy day for me.  It was the National Day of Prayer and I was blessed to attend 3 different times of prayer with my friends and church members.  I met with some coworkers early in the morning at the start of the day and met with some others during lunch.  After work I attended a prayer service at our church.  I attended three different sessions because all of us could not get together at the same time.  We all have different schedules, we live in different areas and we simply were not all able to meet at the same time.  There was just not an acceptable time for all of us to get together.  I am glad it is not that way with the Lord.  We do not have to work around His schedule or wait for a certain time to meet with Him to pray.  The bible says in Psalm 34:17

The righteous cry, and the LORD hears And delivers them out of all their troubles.       Psalm 34:17

Anytime we need help is an acceptable time to cry unto the Lord.  Anytime we need comfort is an acceptable time to call upon His Name.  Anytime we simply want to talk with our Lord and Savior is an acceptable time to pray.  There is no need for us to worry about how busy or rushed the Lord’s schedule may be; He will make time for us.  He is never too busy to listen to His Children.  He is always willing to hear our prayers.  He is always willing to hear our cries and deliver us out of our troubles.

I pray that during the next weeks and months and upcoming year, that I will do a better job of making time for Him.

I pray that you will have a blessed week.  I pray that you will have no trials, no troubles and no tribulations.  But if you do, I pray that you will not wait but that you will immediately go to the Lord and speak to Him.  For it is in a time of prayer and in His presence that I know that you will find peace and comfort.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, prayer, quiet time, witnessing | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Week 7 – Hurting and Helping

Posted on April 26, 2011 by pastorpstephens

I hope that you had a wonderful Easter and enjoyed Resurrection Sunday.  My family had a very good weekend and a very good time of worship.  We had an egg hunt at the church followed by a kids’ sermon and then we had our worship service for everyone at 11:00.  Afterwards, the rest of our family came over to our house for dinner at 4:00.

It was an awesome weekend but I have to say that I was very tired when it was all over.  My body is still very much in the early stages of the recovery mode and going back to work full time last week was harder than I thought it was going to be.  The muscles in my middle and upper back are continuing to experience stiffness and muscle spasms.  It seems like it has been getting progressively worse every night during the last week as I have been waking up earlier and earlier every morning from the cramps and pain.  What started out as a 4:00 am wake up call has now become a “not so gentle rap on the door” at 2:30 am.  The spasms have even extended to my ribs making it uncomfortable to breathe as the other muscles in my back are compensating for the work which has taken place on my lower back preventing those muscles from being able to “pull their own weight”.

The body is amazing in the way that various parts try to compensate for other parts that are injured.  I spoke to my doctor about beginning some therapy so those injured muscles can go back to work and begin to perform as designed again and so that the rest of my body will not have to compensate for them and have the extra stress.  My doctor told me it was too soon after the trauma to expect them to pitch in and start working again.  The muscles in my lower back are still somewhat in shock.  They still need time to heal from the initial pain and trauma and getting back into the same routine will take some time and they will not be able to bear the same load at first.

My discussion with the doctor reminded me of some of the discussions that God has in His word has about His Children, the church, which in scripture is often referred to as the body.  The bible says in 1 Corinthians 12:20 – 26 “But now there are many members, but one body.  And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it”.

Sometimes there are times that our brothers and sisters are injured, either physically, emotionally, mentally, or even spiritually.  Because of that injury they are not the same, they are not whole and they cannot function as they are designed to do by God.  Because we are all members of the same body, when they suffer, we suffer.  We are called to reach out and minister to those who hurt.  We are asked to comfort them just as we would want to be comforted.  The bible says in Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.”  We are asked to support the other members of our body and compensate for them until they heal to the point that the can function properly again.

Supporting other members of our body can come in various forms and fashions.  Sometimes this can mean additional work for us; most times it calls for some sort of sacrifice.  We may need to drive across town in rush hour traffic to take a meal to someone’s house.  We may be called to drive someone to a doctor’s appointment who cannot go on their own.  We may be called to simply sit and hold someone’s hand as they grieve the loss of a loved one.  And always, always we should be in prayer for those who are hurting and in need of recovery.

I think we too often pronounce others ready to go back to “full time duty”, forget to check in on them and drop them off of our prayer list.  We get busy and in a way it seems as if we are asking them to begin to take on tasks again that they are not physically, emotionally, mentally, or even spiritually ready for.  I think it is very important that we prayerfully consider if we are properly and fully supporting hurting individuals.  Do they still need our prayer?  Do they still need someone to hold their hand?  Can they use some help around the home?  Those are questions that are probably not asked enough.  I also think it is important for hurting individuals to be honest with themselves and ask where they are in the healing process.  What do they need?  Where are they in the healing process?  Are they ready to get back on their feet and be a fully functioning member of the body?  It is important to have someone to confide in; someone from whom you can ask for prayer and support.

There are many members of this body of Christ and we are to bear one another’s burdens and thus fulfill the law of Christ.  That means we will have to ask questions about where we are and where others are in the healing process.

So where am I at right now?  Right now, I need some sleep.  Right now, I know that it is too early to start any exercising but I know that it is not too late to still ask for continued prayer.

If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, God, prayer, witnessing | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Week 6 – Recovery Time for Back Surgery; “Shouldn’t I be getting better faster?”

Posted on April 22, 2011 by pastorpstephens

This week is my first week to go back to work and to work full days.  It has been harder than I thought it was going to be.  I have been tired when I get home in the evening and have been falling asleep on the couch right after supper each evening.  I keep thinking, “Shouldn’t I be getting better faster?”   The week before I felt so strong and now it seems like I have taken a step backwards!

I have not been sleeping as well as the night, the muscles in my upper back ache and have been very stiff and when I wake up in the morning, they almost feel like knots.  The feeling has even extended all the way over to my ribs.  Generally once I get up and move around I begin to loosen up.  I have even had some nerve pain in my foot the last couple of days.  I guess it comes from sitting in a chair for 8 – 9 hours at a time and reaching for pens and paper.  I really need to be sure to get up and move around every so often and be extra careful about leaning and reaching for things.  The doctor said these aches and pains are normal as the upper muscles in my back are having spasms as they try to compensate for the smaller ones which have been cut and for the pain and soreness in the lower back.  The occasional nerve pain is normal too and can be expected from time to time in the next couple of months.

All in all the doctor says that I am progressing very well and recovering faster than most.  For that I am thankful.  I know that recovering from a major surgery takes some time – but knowing something and living through it are two different things!  I know that we do not always heal at the same rate and that I will need to continue to place my trust in the Lord during the various ups and downs of my recovery.  I am reminded of a passage in Mark chapter 8 when Jesus healed a blind man and unlike other people Jesus touched, this man did not immediately regain his sight.  The bible says in Mark 8:23 that Jesus took this blind man by the hand, brought him out of his village and then Jesus applied spit upon this man’s eyes and touched him and asked him, “Do you see anything?”  The man replied that he saw men, but they were not yet clear for they “…seemed like trees, walking around”.  The Lord had to lay His hands upon this man again and ultimately the man’s vision was restored.

Just as the Lord worked differently in this man’s life and healing than He worked healing of other blind men, I know that the Lord works differently in each and every one of our lives.  We heal, we grow, we mature at different paces.  The key is this, are we willing to let Jesus take us by the hand and lead us from where we are to where we need to be?  Are we willing to let Him deal with us in His time frame?  If we are, then there is no doubt, that we will be blessed.  There is no doubt we will end up where we need to be.

I know that the Lord will take care of me.  I know that how well my recovery goes will depend on how well I follow my doctor’s instructions and I know that how fast I heal is not entirely in my hands.  And that’s okay, for I trust the Lord and His timing, I simply need to continue to hold His hand.  Be blessed and have a wonderful Good Friday.

 If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, can't go on, witnessing | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Week 5 – I Know That Voice!

Posted on April 12, 2011 by pastorpstephens

I started back to work this week and I am doing pretty well.  I have not had any aches or pains and I have not had any pain meds at all for almost two weeks!  I am only working half days this week, so it has not been too tiring.  I have been going in early and coming home for lunch.  I have been taking a nap when I get home because I have been a little tired.  Next week I will start back on full days.  I think that I will be ready for it.

This weekend was a good weekend and I had a great time at church.  It is so good to be back and fully involved in teaching and preaching again.  This weekend we had a couple of new babies in the worship service.  The service had already started and I heard some baby make some little noise like babies do.  I don’t mind having babies in the service – they help keep some people awake.  I said to myself, “That sounded like Avery my granddaughter,” but I thought it was possible it could be one of the new babies.  My daughter and son-in-law live a pretty good distance from our church so they have been attending one that is only a couple of miles away from their home.  I am okay with that – just as long as they are going.  The bible says we are not to forsake the “assembling of ourselves” with our Christian brothers and sisters.  They still come and see us every now and then with our granddaughter – which my wife and I enjoy immensely.

Anyway, a little while later, I heard another sound – just a little ‘hmmm’ kind of noise – the kind babies make when they don’t have a word for something but they want your attention.  I heard that sound and I said to myself, “That has got to be Avery” because I recognized her voice.  I could not turn around in the front pew because of my back brace.  Later, when I got up to preach I saw her near the back with my daughter and son-in-law; I knew it!  When I began to preach, Avery heard my voice and she turned her head to the front and started pointing at me.  She recognized my voice just like I recognized hers!

It is wonderful how all of our voices are slightly different and have their own octaves and pitches and sounds which are unique.  It is wonderful how we can recognize them and associate them with the different people we know.  Some voices can send shivers up our spine like a gruff boss screaming for that report that we know is overdue.  Others can motivate and encourage us and inspire us to new heights.  And some can make us smile and bring a warmth to our soul just by making a little sing song noise as they point to us out of recognition from where they sit in the back of the church.  No voice, however can bless us more than the voice of the Lord’s.  Jesus said in John 10:27-28

John 10:27 “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me;  and I give eternal life to them, and they shall never perish; and no one shall snatch them out of My hand.”

What a blessing to hear, to recognize and to respond to the voice of the Lord.  What a blessing to follow Him and to receive eternal life, life everlasting which can never be taken from us!  Oh my goodness, we serve an awesome and wonderful Lord!  I hope that you have heard and responded to His voice and to His offer of forgiveness and mercy and love!  I hope that you have spent time in His presence this week!  I hope you have experienced His Grace this week for there is no voice that brings comfort and warmth like the voice of the Lord.

 If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, faith, prayer, quiet time, witnessing | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Week 4 – Preparing to Go Back to Work! Why Be a Bivocational Pastor?

Posted on April 6, 2011 by pastorpstephens

It has been just over 4 weeks since I had my L4 and L5 vertebrae fused.  I am preparing to go back to work in my secular job next week in the insurance claims office.  I have been blessed to work for the same insurance company for 21 years.  As a bivocational pastor for the last 6 years, my schedule has been pretty busy and I must say that I have appreciated the opportunity to rest the last couple of weeks.  I have been afforded the opportunity to do some extra reading, spend some more time with my wife, kids and granddaughter that I would not have been able to do and I have been able to start this website to track my progress, keep my mind busy and to ultimately use for solely for ministry and devotional efforts going forward once I am out of my brace and finished with the rehab and recovery process!  I must say that I have enjoyed the last few weeks of rest.  I also have to say that I think that when the appropriate time comes, I will have no problem with not being bivocational and just being involved in full time ministry.

Some questions that I have been asked from time to time are, “Why are you bivocational?  Why don’t you go fulltime?”  I believe that most of the time the question is asked genuinely without any preconceived notions or someone trying to intimate that as a bivocational pastor “You are perhaps afraid to fully rely on God to meet your financial needs as a full-time pastor if you quit your secular job.  He feeds the sparrows sir, He will feed you.”  I bring this up because I have heard it a couple of times before.  Most of the time when the question comes about why I am a bivocational pastor, the question comes genuinely from someone who is interested in simply knowing how God is working in my life.

I am bivocational because I believe that God wants me to be bivocational.  I surrendered to the call to be a pastor relatively late in life and I was already established in a career in the insurance industry with a good company.  I prayed about whether or not to quit my secular job, but I was not led to do so.  My continuing to work and be bivocational is not because I do not trust God to take care of me financially; it is because I trust that is where He wants me to be.

I look forward to the day that God calls me to full time ministry.  (Can I tell you that there is not really any such thing as part time ministry even for bivocational pastors.)  I know that some day He will call me to leave or retire from my secular job.  I often pray about it and ask Him when; but He has not released me yet.  The bivocational pastor has a relevant ministry and presence in his community and in his workplace.  The workplace is a part of the mission field and presents great opportunities to grow and exercise one’s faith, and share one’s faith.  A bivocational pastor is definitely not secluded and can certainly relate to the issues and daily struggles that the members of his congregation face.  When people know that you are a pastor, they definitely watch to see how you act and react to the various changes and challenges in the workplace.  You will definitely have opportunities to practice what you preach!  Sometimes you won’t do as well as you would have liked and you will have to ask others to forgive you and ask the Lord to help you do better.  Your faith will grow and you will be strengthened as you face the same challenges as the members of your congregation.

A bivocational pastor is also able to meet and interact with a community of people which is larger than the congregation of his church.  As such, he is able to minister to a broader and larger group of people.  Additional opportunities for prayer, comfort, counseling, ministry and evangelism as the Lord leads can take place because of the relationships that develop in the work place.  One must be respectful of the proper workplace protocol, but one can readily and regularly be a Christian presence in the workplace – even if one is not a bivocational pastor!

I do look forward to going back to work next week.  I have been blessed with some wonderful friendships through the years at the office.  I have also been blessed with some wonderful Christian brothers and sisters whom the Lord has allowed me to pray for and who have prayed for me!  The work place can and should be a place where God’s presence is on display for all to see.  I pray that as I return, He will help me to work hard, to be successful and to do a better job of representing Him and fulfilling the words of Matthew 5:16

“Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.”

 If you would like to know more about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you can send me an email directly at pastorpstephens@aol.com

Posted in back surgery, prayer, witnessing | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment